Life can be overwhelming, but don't let it get the best of you.
I'll be turning twenty-five soon (next month) & I can't help but feel that I should have "had it together" by now. New car, nice house, booming business, growing family (a husband & 2.5 kids); nope none of it. As a matter a fact, y'all the door handle to my driver door fell off. lol. This happened as I was leaving the bank in an effort to get my finances in order. I couldn't win for losing. I just climbed in through the passenger side went home & took a nap. lol.
I have my days just like we all do, so I don't mind sharing. It's human...we're human & I think the glamorous social media life has us forget this. People tend to not value honesty as much as it should be. But the thing is your honesty may be the thing that helps the next person going through the same thing if not worse. Or your honesty may have somebody help you in an area that they didn't know you needed help. Putting your game face on is one thing, but fronting is another. Look, I know how it feels to have your heart broken. I know how it feels to be broke. I know how if feels to be depressed while in college. Hell, I know how it feels to be depressed OUT of college. You're not the only one.
So if you're honest with yourself & feel overwhelmed sometimes like me here are some things to consider...
Consult with God
In any & every thing you do in your life you should first & foremost consult with Jehovah God. It's easy to talk to our friends & family about things. & sometimes they have some good advice or experience in the area. But no one is going to help you as much as God is. He tells us to never worry & to trust Him with all of our burdens. He knows what we need before we need it & His timing is perfect. So whatever is ailing you at this point in your life pray about it, stop worrying, do the work & be patient.
Lately I have been feeling overwhelmed with what I feel is too many people have something to say about MY life. Everybody has an opinion just like they have a..(either you know the saying or you don't hehe.) "Oh Jenee' you should do this or I don't think you need to do that. Have you tried this?" YES! Leave me alone!!! lol They mean well, but look at the end of the day I have to live MY life not anybody else. If something goes bad I have to deal with it not anybody else. I'm too old to say "well So & So told me to do XYZ" when something goes wrong. While I appreciate your concern let me do me. lol. As humans no matter how good our intentions are we are flawed & imperfect & often time can really only speak from our perspective. So I'll take what you have to say in slight consideration, but ultimately I'll consult God.
Stop Telling Everybody Everything
The first point makes me think of another. It's great to get out your thoughts & share with friends & family, but everybody doesn't need to know everything. When you share too openly that is what sometimes gives people the "permission" to comment on YOUR life. But with this commenting also may come negativity, hate, & doubt. Now you're feeling overwhelmed. "Well I thought I had this great idea but So & So said they tried & failed or they don't think I should do that." SKRRRT (That's my mind coming to hault lol) Um..has So & So ever run a blog? Is So & So trying to do anything different to change their current situation? How can So & So even help me bring this idea into fruition? Yea, that's what I thought. So So & So doesn't need to know.
I've learned that sometimes it's best to keep even the GOOD things to yourself. If you say something prematurely not really knowing when it's going to happen then next thing you know they're like "Oh I thought you were supposed to do XYZ...what happened to that?" Hate. Doubt. Overwhelmed.
& then some people are just plain nosey. lol. When it happens they'll know. Protect your peace. It's okay not to let everybody in.
Stop Comparing Your Life to Others
We do it without noticing, but you have to stop comparing your life to others. That's one of the main reasons we feel like we haven't reached a certain level is because we're looking at somebody else's life. "OMG. She's younger than me & getting married." "We graduated together & he's further along in his career." "Her blog following is bigger than mine & she started after me." Look, we don't know WHAT they had to go through to get where they are. Don't know how many nights they cried, how hard they worked, what they had to sacrifice. What is for you is for you. Life is not a competition nor a race.
Brings me to my next point...
Understand There's a Process
Okay so you get the dream job but don't have the training. Or you get the nice car but can't afford the additional maintenance, gas, or insurance. What's the point of getting what you want if you're not prepared for it?
Understand that everything you go through is a process. Use the time now to prepare for what you want in the future. Save your money, take some classes, build your credit. Focus on the now instead of being so consumed with the future. As you make steps day by day you'll be further along than you could have ever imagined. You are exactly where you need to be when you need to be.
Focus on What You Have Versus What You Don't
With focusing on the present, instead of always complaining about what you don't focus on the things that you do have. Make a list of the things that you have now. I bet 3-5 years ago some of things weren't even a thought. While I don't have the things I thought I should have by now that I stated in the beginning..I have a college degree, I am working in my field, I have a growing brand, & I'm a business owner! Whatttt!?
*Phewwww! Feeling a lil less overwhelmed now? I sure do. If not, just take a nap that usually helps. lol. You don't "have it all together" right now & that's okay. God says we lack nothing. As you remember this & continue to make strides every day you'll be "there" before you know.
Questions? Comments? Concerns? Drop them below or shoot me an email if you're shy!